If Music be the Food of Love, Play On

knowing me, you know that i'm a skeptic and a realist; some may think that i am a pessimist, but i know better. i wish i could believe in the one thing that so many people base their lives on, what little girls dream about, what women pray for and what men secretly long for, love. well, i guess i shouldn't say i don't believe in love because i do. love literally saved the world and i will forever believe in the love that saved a dying race and a world that was and is swimming in a cesspool of sin.

but the love i speak of is one that is said to make you do crazy things, lift you up where one belongs, makes you act foolish, blah, blah blah!!!! i'm not sure what makes me so cynical about what i have seen for the last 24 years. my parents have been married for 25 years and have known each other for about 30 years and they love each other and will continue to love each other until they're dying day, but i don't get it.

i want to understand, and i've had conversations with friends and family and i want to believe in happy endings, but i'm not sure if i do. the worst part about it is i've seen it, i live in the house with it and i see it all the time. will all the great love stories written from Romeo and Juliet to Edward and Bella i can't seem to find the connection.

i have my moments, although not very often, where i wish i were riding through Tuscany with the wind in my hair, without a care in the world and with the love of my life. then reality sets in. i want to believe in epic love, that which surpasses time and space, a love that reaches from heart to heart, one that lives on forever.

i wonder where my cynicism comes from? only God knows, but i believe one day this cynical girl with a heart for people will truly believe and have a heart for love. but until then, i will leave you with the words from histories great storyteller, William Shakespeare:

"Doubt that the stars are fire, Doubt that the sun doth move his aides, Doubt truth to be a liar, But never doubt I love "